Rape has been on my mind a lot lately, and I've been dancing around
posting about this. There are so many things that could be said about
the subject, but I primarily want to talk about my reaction to people,
stories, and things I've read. To sum it up in a neat sentence...I
experience extreme fits of rage when confronted with the horrors we
inflict on others, particularly men on women in the form of rape. And I
do mean extreme anger. It's my reaction I want to focus on, but to do
that, we need to go back to what triggers this anger.
I've always considered rape one of the worst forms of torture and, at
one point, used to think I'd rather die than face that. Looking back I
realize my feelings on this may have always been abnormally strong. I
say abnormally because I don't often hear women near me express as much
outrage as I feel.
This particular post was triggered by a series of occurances in
nonchronological order.
(1) A recently acquired acquaintance (male) seems to have a penchant for
making rape jokes. I don't find this funny and am actually disturbed by
it. I am left without a way to respond. If I actually thought he
himself were a threat, I would do something about it. The problem is
that I think he's basically a nice guy with a few weird personality
quirks.
(2) I also don't know why I subject myself to Law and Order Special
Victims Unit...it always pisses me off.
(3) Then there was the book, The Natashas, about the new sex trade.
Particularly disturbing were reports in the book of abuses perpetrated
by the U.S. military, UN workers, police, etc.
(4) A good friend of my boss was raped about 6 weeks ago and the
roommate of the daughter of the president of my organization was, too.
I felt so much pain for these women...too much considering I didn't even
know them. I still have trouble shaking my boss's friend from my mind.
(5) An article in Ms. Magazine, "Not Women Anymore...", was the straw
that broke the camel's back. The article detailed the rape of millions
of women in the Congo as a weapon of war. It talked of gang rapes of
women...mothers, daughters, children. Of rape that destroyed their
internal organs because they were often raped with objects like
bayonets, branches, etc. It also referenced this as a trend as it
recalled Rwanda and now the Darfur.
I read this last article on a metro ride home and was so enraged that
the site of the men on the train made me physically ill. I wanted them
to hurt the way these women had just because their gender. And this
acquaintance...if I had seen him at that moment, I probably would have
punched him. I've never punched someone in my entire life, but I was
pretty enraged.
I feel like I should end with some big psychoanalysis on why this brings
out so much anger in me and why men rape; however, typing all of this
and dredging up these emotiond has drained me. I'll leave all of this
as something to ponder.
--radicalflower
